puma perl

imprinted

ghosts walk with me
there are no fresh footprints
on scarred souls of old streets
once we were everywhere
now i fade soundless, blind

NYU students sit on a stoop
once a guy stumble down those stairs
blood spilled from his head
pills fell from his pockets
an english girl said oh my

i use old student ids
buy tickets in the public theater
remember a memorial for a poet
the women who loved him were there
they cut their eyes at each other
waited for their names to be called
or for a mention in poems and stories
the boys that he abused were there too
chasing each other across the stage
his sisters collected autographs
from movie extras, failed players
not a word of truth was spoken here

i used to hate seventh street
Ukrainian women stood in doorways
glared at me, they knew me
from the hotel rooms they cleaned
today a man waits for his wife
she comes out of the boutique
does a little tap dance for him
dances in my space, in my sidewalk square
another day i might have danced back
flirted with her man just cause i could
today smoky spirits surrounds me
invisible to dancing women in newsboy caps

yet i can’t stop thinking about her
why is she wearing that hat
was she dancing for his amusement or her own
does her head explode in firecracker bursts
does her husband ever dance with her or does he watch
she tap-danced so close she almost touched me
invisible i floated away with my ghosts
down different streets where once we danced

i am invisible in black leather and jeans
i am invisible in boots and mascara
ghosts carry me through cell phone chatter
girls who sing when they talk
tough boys who crumble at night
November threatens all who live here
with dark afternoons and holidays
i am invisible, ghosts fall like leaves
women tap dance on sacred squares
i am invisible, imprinted, scarred,
i am invisible, ghosts dance away with me
every step is a memory, imprinted, unseen

like a normal person

I didn't want to go home
There'd be no one there but me
I'd end up talking to myself
Baseball is like life
I'd say for the thousandth time
Shut the fuck up
I'd tell myself
As I stared morosely out the window
Thinking about sex and cigarettes

I wanted to go to a bar
Watch the Yankee game like a normal person
Drink a few beers like a normal person
Get really drunk if they lose
Like a normal person
Probably get thrown out of the bar
Like a normal person
Stagger down the street to another bar
Realize I'm drunker than a normal person
Go shoot some dope
Just a little once in awhile
Like a normal person