junk love or withdrawal part 1: denial
we sat across from each other in
that Chinese place with the gold
wallpaper and mirrors on the walls,
one red poppy in every vase on
every table, deep red, sin-red,
new york red, I looked into its dark eye,
drunk, looked at you over fancy drinks,
mai-tais and tequila sunrises
your pale mushroom face, your eyes
a silent thunder and we agree to
keep going keep drinking
the waitress always hovering
our reflections bending and twisting around
the cold room, it’s getting dark outside
it’s getting summer outside but still
winter in both of us
excuse the mirror images
ignore the reflections
it’s just me and you, kid,
forget what dances in the periphery:
we are tough as jazz, cities
built on our shoulders.
good listener
this title
seems to follow me wherever I go
these people spot me from great distances
& now I can spot them too:
wet worm-hole of your mouth is opening,
it glistens sickly pink
I knew, I knew as soon as I saw you
it would open & suck me in with
its hunger, greed, pulling, tugging
you think I’m like you
(whatever that is)
but you don't care what I am
you somehow believe
I’ll understand you and listen quietly
you knew I would do it,
it never matters how desperately
I signal you
bang my eyes closed from inside,
shutters to keep you out
because you
are a fly, wobbly & dumb,
aimless until
you smell it, like blood or shit,
my weakness:
you KNOW I won’t walk away.
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